The gang currently terrorising cheese merchants all over the south of Britain have struck again.

Mere weeks after the first picture of UFCs appeared we have more. This latest amateur photo came from a reader in London who spotted the piece of cheese above the famous Battersea Power Station, apparently floating towards Earls Court. No one yet knows what the cheese is doing or where it comes from.

Paul Harrison, owner of a beautiful house in our beloved Somerset came home yesterday from his work as a tax accountant to find his house had been taken over by Giant Primates.

Alan Shearer is set to leave his beloved home town team at the end of the season, after hoping to lift the FA Cup on their third attempt. The destination..... Europe? no, America? No, infact not even on this planet. Shearer shall leave in a £100 million deal to a team in a galaxy far far away.

Last week Mr. Johnathan Stealwit saw his life destroyed by a large piece of fig and walnut gorgonzola. He had been walking home from the office on Tuesday evening, at 10:20pm last Wednesday when disaster struck in the form of falling cheese. Stealwit, 32, oblivious to the impending doom, didn't realise anything was wrong until he'd been hit on the head by the three tonne piece of cheese. DI Double Gloucester, the officer in charge of the investigation into the incident said to a packed and slightly delirious press conference, "The Doctors say it's unbelievable that he survived, the cheese, a three tonne piece of Gorgonzola, was being imported into the country from Italy." He continued to say "The Police forensic group say that the impact of the three tonne cheese would have been the equivalent of 75 tonnes. This obviously means he is so very lucky to still be alive."

Mr. Simon Bosworth 32, of Cheese Farm, Cramlington in Northumberland is today thanking God for the large piece of Gouda, that yesterday heroically saved him from drowning. At about 6:30am yesterday morning, Mr Bosworth life changed forever, thanks to his cheese lunch.

It began with Giant Simians in Somerset, it continued with sights of sixty three foot dolphins in a Derby based Woolworth's store. And then reports yesterday of giant amphibians on the plains of the Savannah.

Today the biggest yet!!! Birds, or should I say one bird, a towering sight, an almost frightening sight... A Puffin the height of a house. The Puffin, estimated at 12ft is captured in the garden of a South Glamorgan home. Puffins, a very attractive coast claiming bird, are so as British as Tea on the lawn and cricket in the afternoons. But never Puffins on this scale.