THE TWO HARRYS
What do the two Harry’s do? Here’s the lowdown based on Beenleigh’s Claims of Harry’s double life along with other “off the record” royal employee observations

FAT HARRY
The real Harry's day begins when he awakes, knocks one out, and then gets out of bed at 3pm.  He is served a mammouth fry up that is served on his special 2metre wide 'fat man's plate.' He had his special 'fat man's plate' custom built from solid gold encrusted with diamonds. During breakfast, which includes 30 eggs and 100 rashers of bacon, he polishes off 2 bottles of port.
Then it's off shooting horses in the Royal stables.  "Harry started shooting the horses because he's too fat to ride one of them these days and he misses his hunting." a Royal mole told us.   "It distresses the Queen and his father a great deal, but they overlook his shooting their horses because he's family."
At 7pm it's dinner time and Harry tucks into a whole roasted pig with all the trimmings, washed down with 3 or so bottles of Champagne. Heavy marijuana use then ensues, as the third in line to the throne plays combat games on his Xbox360 for hours on end.  As 'the munchies'kick in he gorges on truffles, frois gras and stilton washed down with brandy.
At around 5am he just has time for a quick supper of  game pie, roast spuds and baked beans, with a bottle of single malt whisky. He then staggers off to bed, or is actually usually carried there by several butlers.

CYBORG HARRY
Beaten awake by a screaming sarge at 4am yelling to "Press 400!!!"
Breakfast of baked beans and scrambled eggs with bread at 5am.
Shower, inspection etc then onto the assualt course at 6am.
Morning spent marching, running for miles with heavy equipment, being screamed at by sarge.
Lunch at 12noon, pie and mash.
Afternoon spent the same as the morning with the marching, running, training etc.
Dinner at 6, meat and veg. Then evening Activities; brawling, sadistic abuse etc until lights out at 10pm. 

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