Don’t feel alone, or a failure. Erectile dysfunction is more common than you may think and even such macho people such as soccer star Pele have suffered. This cure is such a turn on; we often just do this for a bit of erotic fun here in the CT offices. (Obviously never as a group event, only with our designated partner - with the exception of the Christmas party 1992, but we were exceptionally drunk that time!) Take a refrigerated cream cheese and whisk in a food processor to make it more pliable. Now rub cheese all over your flaccid penis. It will soon be hard and ready for action. If you begin to droop again, just add more cheese and get your partner to talk dirty. If alone then talk dirty to yourself.

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