In house tobacco expert and reader's therapist

Sir Douglas Ten Benson was born in 1900 and is Britain's second biggest tobacco magnate, with a personal wealth of £6.8Billion. He is a proud pipe smoker, and at 107 years old, he is very much set in his ways.  He was jailed for life, and served 12 years, when he was  convicted of killing a man with a musket in a duel with a love rival in 1963.  The dead man's son, the rival tobacco billionaire Lance Bombardier Maurice Twenty-Rothman, is his nemesis with whom he battles every waking hour of every single day.

He recently joined the Cheese Times as our resident Agony Uncle after lying on his application form and at his subsequent interview.  Hebelieves tobacco is the answer to all of humanities problems.

Interesting Trivia: His 18th wife Beverly was Miss UK 1986. He accredits his old age to smoking pipe tobacco everyday since the age of 11, and two large brandies a night.

Claim to Fame: He exclusively supplied both Britain and Germany with tobacco during both world wars.

Greatest Professional Achievement: see above, and being on the front page of ‘Pipe Smokers Monthly’ more than any other person by far.