Robert Kilroy Silk-Cut, celebrity racist and maker of the famous cigarettes, recently launched his own new UK political party. The perma-tanned Ex UK Independence Party member is ‘almighty leader’ in the new party ‘Veritas’. Veritas, the Latin word for ‘bitter racist scare-mongering’ was launched with much posturing from the ex BBCTV agony Aunt as he proceeded to do a variety of every more strenuous muscle-man poses for the gathered and weeping press.

His first move was to recruit fellow celebrity racist Ron “That Lazy Thick Fucking Nigger” Atkinson, the disgraced soccer pundit, as his no.2. Kilroy told the press conference “We’re not afraid to say what we think, or afraid to crack the usual racist gags.” Before moving on to blame all modern day havoc, including the recent tragic Asian tsunami and the 1986 US Challenger space shuttle disaster on UK immigration policy. Kilroy hit the racist headlines recently by ignorantly claiming that Islam has given ‘bugger all’ to the world, where as Ron “TLTFN” Atkinson got his nickname for his description of a black soccer star live on TV. Both were sacked from the positions they had used to espouse their bile. Bob Kilroy silk-cut aims to get racist funny man Bernard Manning onboard too, as a spokesperson for Veritas, saying “I can’t wait to hear his Pakki gags.”

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