|
BUSH’S NEMESIS MAY BE HIDING WITH GOATS CHEESE RATIONS IN UK! EXCLUSIVE! The cheese-times have uncovered unnerving evidence of the presence of yet more terrorists in the UK. Even more alarming than that is the appearance of the most bizarre piece of evidence yet to come to light. MP’s have been given clear instructions, from the very highest level, not to discuss this incident and evidence at all and to "deny, deny, deny it." Luckily we at the cheese-times have our secret sources and it’s amazing how people will spill the beans when offered substantial quantities of cheese.
Our source is the wife of a Prime Minister and asked to remain anonymous. She told us that there was a major security scare at a London underground station a couple of weeks ago that the government managed to keep under wraps. The incident involved an Arab chap in a photo-me booth who was bringing attention to himself by poking a massive gun from behind the curtains and taking pot shots at passers by. Luckily no one was badly injured but one man needed hospital treatment for bad chaffing and a chin sprain after throwing himself down a flight of two stairs to escape the possible carnage.
SWAT teams called to the scene exchanged fire with the man but backed off after he produced what was thought to be plastic explosives. These ‘explosives’ have since been found to be harmless organic goat’s cheese. The chap made good his escape through maintenance shafts and tunnels and has eluded authorities ever since. After a half assed search of the photo-me booth police found crucial evidence in the form of photo’s taken by the booth during the skirmish clearly showing a man who looks identical to Al Q’ada terror chief and showbiz villain Osama Bin Laden. "The photo’s show this chap holding and feasting on the Stilton cheese, the nations king of cheese, we take this as giving a two fingered salute to his enemies." Said our source Surely, just the chance that the worlds no.1 terror suspect is at large in Britain should send alarm bells ringing through Westminster, but according to our source MP’s are simply hoping that if it is him, he’ll behave himself and leave of his own accord. Pressure for the government to come clean on this issue increased further earlier today when secret phone transcripts of a conversation between government minister Estelle Morris and shadowy underground cartoon character Crafty Dog were released. Estelle - He’s here you know? Not here in my house... (Sustained laughter) But Tony said he is here in the UK! Crafty Dog : Who is this? Estelle : Bin Laden silly! Crafty Dog : I think you have the wrong number madam... Estelle : Who is this!? Crafty Dog : Crafty Dog. Cartoon nemesis of... Estelle : What!!!? CALL ENDS. Related Articles: Bush - Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry 'A Training Camp for Al-Qa'ida' Al-Qaeda in Giant Pie Threat |